Category: Your child

Xenophobia hits harder again- it’s just a tip of what goes on elsewhere

Dear South Africa, Nelson Mandela just fought against Apartheid, which similarly comprised of what your children are bragging with today(Bloodshed and discrimination)…

Women hold Wrath,and here is why(2)

A girl raised in family where her mother is physically abused by the the father. The beatings, screens and wails eachday.

Most girls, like sheep have been sold off-more by their parents-into unplanned marriages, since the men who desired them had money,  “Listen to me my daughter. Iam your parent,  and I know what’s best for you, “they stated.

To this day girls are waking up in realisation that they’ve for long lived under oppression and abuse. 

A girl since childhood is molested by her uncle, brother, her real father. She doesn’t enjoy it,  but again fears how society will turn against her if she uttered out a word about an abuse from with in. Again, what does she know?, she will assume.   ‘How dare you insult your father? ‘, they’d state.

Most ladies,  especially in marriage relationships, the pleasure of romance,  intimacy and sexual satisfaction is a fantacy(they only dream of,  or watch in TV Soaps), since to men, they are rather serving a role of quenching their sexual urge. 

A lady won’t get an office job or promotion,  since the proposed terms are ‘A night with the Employer’ -but again, some do.

A lady lost her job since she couldn’t give in to the desires of her male manager. 

Strange a girl would find it how at some cases,  she is told to report for an interview (not in public,  not during day,  yet not in the company of others),  but at a weired venue-a hotel or lodge. 

A lady was raped by her boss. In fear of losing the job,  she swallowed the pain,  gave birth- and carried on. She was fired from her job,  and couldn’t stand against the defiler. 

Another was decieved into sleeping with her employer-to-be. She got the job. Things went on as planned,  but not for longer- as the same criteria was used for another lady. Yes,  a broken heart she turned out to be. 

Imagine the many single mothers, doing all sorts of jobs as they raise their kids- whose fathers denied responsibility.

After her secondary level, she had to surely search for a job. A bar tender she was employed to be. But she learnt how her shift was twisted to night time. One day she was escorted back by a fine handsome lad-who seemed a good Samaritan. On her way,  her last memory before it all was taking a sip of a soft drink. 

Bedridden for 2 months,  investigations indicated how she had been raped by 6 men. She survived, but with a pregnancy and HIV/Aids. No one was brought to justice like the courts sayings state ‘there wasn’t enough evidence’. 

It turns out a suddening aspect how there are women, who haven’t stood up for girls or their fellows,  but rather set traps for them(that too is for another day post).

This all, and more, like a Cancer has eaten them up, drained their souls, that no more they still exist as gentle being’s, but betrayed personalities,thirsty for revenge.

From deeper experience, women today hold great wrath, which like never before might affect generations.

But for any success,  especially in restoring the plight of a girl-child and a woman,  it starts right from a family, the upbringing, and society systems, it’s a joint role.

Hiring Maids, an issue to closely look into, as KCCA faces blame

By Andrew Israel Kazibwe

Gone is this week which has highlighted infants, neglect and brutality towards them. To social sites the topics have far more raised debates trough which wrath can more be tasted by parents and those in hopes of joining the line.
Earlier on was the sudden death of baby Ssemaganda an infant who was knocked dead by a reversing (Kampala City Council Authority) KCCA vehicle at the KCCA premises where the baby’s mother was being remanded after being arrested on charges of illegal vending of bananas.
The public, till now is brutal towards the tough restrictions city authorities are implementing. Of course as officials would claim, it was an accident (the baby’s death), and further led by the KCCA boss Jenifer Musisi apologised for the negligence, a contribution by the KCCA boss of 2 million Ug. Shillings, a sack of Rice, a sack of sugar and a 10-litre Jerry can of cooking oil were offered to the deceased’ family to help out with burial arrangements, which I hear were rejected. Of course this ‘contribution’, in the eyes of many, seemed more than ‘compensation,’ yet with life, this can’t be comparable.
The week has really ended in a more, further miserable mood, as a house maid was discovered by parents as she for long had victimised a little girl. With brutality she would batter the infant in a cold-hearted way. Through the video clip which is said to have been recorded by one of the parents through a cam, later making way onto local news Televisions and later onto social sites has raised a lot of concerns, not only in Uganda but elsewhere, thanks to severance cams, which many parents are to more rush for as a primary solutions to what has long been hidden, if any.

As I write or you read this piece, curiosity more rises of ‘Whether one’s child is safe back home’ or how safe children are in the hands of house maids or nannies.

We can less blame the parents for entrusting maids with lives of their children, but we further would not keep ourselves from thinking and asking why maids will turn out so evil!
It is true, due to the ‘burning’, tightening situation faced by the entire society, parents are better versed with their job descriptions than the lives they are meant to save. This doesn’t leave out the well-to-do families as these silently fall victims.
What would trigger a maid to turnout so reckless and cold-hearted is believed to be related to the employers-aren’t maids more passing on their grieve and ill treatment to the naive children?

How parents treat a maid more affects the lives of children they take care of. Most African maids aren’t trained to do so and many have no idea on parenting, yet parents aren’t closer to their children than they feel. So, what would one consider before, during and after hiring a maid?

Andrew Israel Kazibwe is an African Rwandan-based freelance Journalist , a learner, Arts enthusiast and advocate. Passionate about what goes on within lives, he shares whats within, around and closer to you. Its an Insight!!! 

Today’s Youth- A haunted Generation

By Andrew Israel Kazibwe

What comes to your mind when the word ‘Youth’ is spotted, mentioned or come across?
I do endlessly ponder on it-since am part of the lot who may or may not have fallen victim of what haunts them. To me ‘Youth’ are power, courage, will, hope that comes to thought. For a minute or two,just think about it ‘YOUTH’
Isn’t it the youth who hold the largest percentage in population today, and unlike before, they are everywhere?
In this century, its them who have more been educated too and further well exposed to all sorts of knowledge that has led to many being haunted.

You must be wondering and pondering what haunts the youth. Yes, they dominate in population, education…then ‘unemployment’
leading to crime. See when youth were dragged to school (from way back in infancy to their powerful teens), they, we thought education was everything, and with education, that course, there was certainty that good employment was guaranteed then a good living. This didn’t last for long, because as the economies grew, so did the population but not jobs!

This is a spanning plague which is gradually eating up the strong African generation. I blame it on lack of career guidance which is a ‘dream’ in most African countries’ education curriculum yet the education acquired too doesn’t equip them enough to face the competitive job market. Youth today are taught and advised to’Study harder and qualify so as to get good employment’ and not to ‘create good jobs’. See, due to disappointments and bitterness resulting from the pain of ‘lack of employment’, any opportunity presenting itself will be snatched at ‘any cost’. Look at who dominate most wars, rebel groups, crimes, prostitution…
So, one can clearly visualise the picture of power, just as they can be mobilized to tear apart an economy so powerful, they can be in turn to build an economy to its might. Problem is that they are most thought of and needed in campaigns and election times.

Looking into the future, just a few years from now, who is to blame or not-for saving the generation so strong, yet disappointed from discovering how ‘Haunted they are’?

Andrew Israel Kazibwe is an African Rwandan-based freelance Journalist , a learner, Arts enthusiast and advocate. Passionate about what goes on within lives, he shares whats within, around and closer to you. Its an Insight!!! 

Africa’s thirst for Human Rights (2)

It can hardly be sieved-the difference between Civil Society and the governments, of course those in governance, elites and the a few who’ve come across this knowledge in a higher learning institutions can; leaving the majority at crossroads. Most education curriculums in Africa aren’t designed this way that Human Rights are ventured into at a later stage not early stage; yet it wouldn’t be expensive if it was otherwise.
Human Rights Vs African beliefs and norms
When one talks of ‘Human Rights’, in Africa this paints a contradicting picture. For instance, in the most traditional African societies the ‘elders’ are meant to be respected and highly regarded as blameless whose orders and decisions are taken unquestionably; a child would never come out and claim to be punished (even under mistreatment) in line with fighting for their rights or a woman over taking a lead in decision making. Yes, this is changing, but slowly and not entirely.
A lady enlightened how rights could simply be taught- from a simple perspective; it’s just a sense of objectivity of how all human beings should be treated, a fair treatment for all that in the end maintains peace in society. So, child rights, women rights, workers’ rights to mention but a few may from a broad sense from the African perspective be seen as a disgrace to society.
It may broadly be seen and sensed as a form of selfishness; that most people are still naïve about Human Rights, who and what Civil Society organisations are and as to why all this isn’t directly incorporated into the curriculum at an early stage. Of course, this is the governments’ role and form of sensitization.
Most African citizens should be blamed less for ignorance about Human Rights, since in one way or another they back lash with the African norms and customs and make governments in power unease. Hope an calmer remedy can be sought soon.

FGM still haunting Girls in Kenya, Uganda

A nightmare it is still to girls especially among the Kuria people of Kenya and some parts of Tanzania. Circumcision has proved a life threatening ritual that some among society live to regret.
In a recent screening last at Goethe institut Kigali of ‘The Cut’, a movie 43 minutes documentary film by Beryl Bagoko as the director. The award winning film portraying the painful cultural ritual of circumcision and female genital mutilation (FGM) majorly among a certain tribe in Kenya, still being taken it on strongly by some people is a touching story of pain faced.
The story digs deep into reality of the painful celebration and initiation of one into becoming a real man, and a woman.
“Indeed people have customs, and this is not worth bearing!,” Pierre Kwitonda from the audience wondered.
The story features live testimonies of girls to women about the whole experience basically among women; with misunderstanding, till to date in societies; with some saying ‘it makes one areal woman’ while others also sticking onto the ritual admitting to the fact that it FGM reduces sexual pleasure and libido of one which controls fornication among women. The discrimination it yields among the un circumcised is expressed while the pain one goes through is witnessed through this movie.
The documentary also features interviews by Kenya based health personnel who too testify against the ritual saying that it leads to reproductive complications especially among expectant mothers and that there is a high risk of disease infections among those being circumcised since it is carried out by people outside the health sector; equipment used isn’t sterilized.
Despite the fact that this tribal act has been stronger before, through campaigns, especially through schools, awareness has been created and some of the people are now being convinced of the health affecting dangers involved.
Talking of the Kuria people in Kenya, and some parts of Tanzania reminds me of the Amudat people of Uganda, where the same custom occurs, region’s political leaders leave in fear of condemning it in public-according to sources but a statement against this practice has been issued by Uganda’s junior Minister in charge of primary health care.

It takes real courage and determination to end the ritual which has persistently eaten deep in some societies. I wonder how many are to stand up longer in this fight!

Children Rights vs Parents’ Role

Children Rights vs Parents’ Role

By Andrew Israel Kazibwe

Indeed gone they are, the times when parents had ‘a say’. In Africa, just like a proverb states it, “It takes a village to raise a Child.” So it was, the whole village could face blame and shame if indiscipline was sighted in a child; it was every adult’s role to standup in upbringing every child, just like a norm or a ritual. Considering today’s generation where; parents don’t request but beg, make no orders but painfully abide by what the young dudes desire…Is it all in the interest and respect of

Parenting them (net photo)
Parenting them (net photo)

‘Child rights’, obedience of the law? After thein 1989, governments worldwide promised to adopt to honoring and implementing children rights. This was and is based on what a child deserves and after the realization of the fact that most children suffered from conditions so important that bared them from happily and healthily living. Indeed, they had it all under control,they could lead the way, respect had a place, they were not generally looked at as just ‘caretakers’ Today, they’ve been exposed to vast sorts of information which are all in a bid to ‘protect their rights’; yes, ‘Human rights’ and children stand tall in fighting, for ‘their Rights’; and the parent is the victim here. The ‘Courts of law’ are their refuge in the name of protection, and it is the ‘adults’ behind all this. And when it is all said and done, children are not only let in exposure of privileges of ‘rights’ but to the worse today; crime, drug abuse, prostitution…so, they too fall victims. Referring to Paul J Preston, 2004-2012′ writing as he puts emphasis on parenting strategies;

They fall victims these days,who is to blame? (net photo)
They fall victims these days,who is to blame? (net photo)

basing on Thorndike, E. L.’s (1927). The Law of effect. American Journal of Psychology, 39, 212-222 he states, “Some parents will agree with only part of what I have said. They agree that children should receive reinforcement for desirable behaviors, but they disagree that children need punishments for undesirable behaviors. They think that punishment is cruel or abusive. They prefer to ignore bad behavior in the belief that it will just go away.” Pity is upon parents of the next two generations to come because today takes it’s roots and of course many will look on… So, is parenting a pride still?